Be the God That You Are

The world has taught me that I am a small and insignificant being.
The world has taught me that my wants and needs
are not as important as the wants and needs of others.
The world has filled my head with the idea
that no one could love me
and that those who did were just an exception to the rule.
But my soul has found its voice and responds,
"Let go of the script and be the God that you are."

I have been taught that the world is too dangerous a place for me.
I have been taught that no one is to be trusted.
The world has convinced me that I must remain
unseen and unheard in order to stay safe.
But my soul has found its voice and responds,
"Let go of the story and be the God that you are."

I have felt powerless against the rising tides of grief.
I have felt overwhelmed by the unrepentant current of raging rivers.
I have felt impossibly small and terribly lost
in the vast and timeless dark night of the soul.
But my soul has found its voice and reminds me,
"Let go of the mask and be the God that you are.
Let go of the mask and be the God that you are."

Letting Go of the Legacy of Pain

My biological father may have hurt me,
May have violated me,
But he was an innocent child once;
A child who was also hurt and violated.
An innocent child who,
Went through so much trauma,
That the good in him
Never had a chance to be expressed:
The God in him
Never had a chance to be expressed.
After years of abuse,
His world became black and white,
Not in the sense of good and bad
But black and white in the sense
Of victim and victimizer.
He felt that his only recourse
Was to beat or be beaten,
To strike or be struck.
He felt so powerless within himself
That the only way to feel powerful
Was to harm the harmless.
My biological father violated me
Because of his own self-hatred
And deep fear of the world.
Yes, my father hurt me,
But his own pain must have been unimaginable
For him to do something so unconscionable. 
For this reason,
And to grant myself peace,
I choose right now,
To let go
Of his legacy of pain.