Never Had A Chance

People often wonder why
I'm so far behind.
I'll tell you why.
It's because my starting line
was set in quicksand.

And after six years
of wading,
of straining,
of toiling,
of crawling
through the quicksand
I was finally given solid ground.

But I had never stood
on solid ground before;
so I constantly
doubted its constancy.

Can't you understand,
can't you see
that I never had a chance?

I never had a chance
to learn to love myself.
I never had a chance
to own self-confidence.
I never had a chance
to trust that I was safe...
or to even care.

I never had a chance
to believe in my worth.
I never had a chance
to believe I was wanted.
I never had a chance
to believe I was anything...
but a victim.

Can't you see,
can't you understand,
that I never had a chance...
and yet
I can't blame it all on the quicksand.

From this moment forward,
I will delve into the practice of self-love
until it becomes natural.
From this moment forward,
I shall cultivate my confidence
until it comes whenever I call upon it.
From this moment forward,
I shall step forth into my
newly accepted power.
From this moment forward
I will not allow my past life
to weigh my heart down with lead.

From this moment forward
I will see the quicksand
as something that has
bolstered and enhanced,
strengthened and fortified
my tenacity,
my perseverance,
my courage,
my resolve.

For if it wasn't for
other people's moments of weakness,
I would not have sought
my inner strength.