The Pillars of My Heart

    I've been blessed with the knowledge that the pillars of my community are also the pillars of my heart. The love they share with me strengthens my heart and fortifies my courage. (Yes, I used 'courage' here because of the etymology of courage: the Latin root 'cor' meaning 'heart', & 'coeur' is French for heart.) As I embark on the next leg of my journey, knowing that I have them behind me, supporting me, is the only thing allowing me to press ever onward. In the next few months, I will have to face my past fully and completely and find a way to let it go. My hope is that when the memories are recovered, I will be surrounded by so much light, that they will not overwhelm my heart and mind. Even without the memories, my heart often breaks for my childhood self. I have learned so much about what happened that day, and in the days that followed, that I am less than eager to recover these memories. But apparently the only way for me to let the past go is to be given a chance to process the trauma that was never processed. Having been far too young and having very little competent support, it was impossible.

Thank You, God, for aligning my path with this community.
Thank You, God, for opening my heart to their love for me.
Thank You, God, for granting me exactly what I need for this part of my journey.
Thank You, God, for these people who have become the pillars of my heart.
I know I could not face this part of my path alone,
so I thank You, God, for all the people who have chosen to lift me up in their light.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.