An Unexpected Debbie Downer Day

    Despite waking at 4 a.m. or so this morning, I was flying sky high. I couldn't have been happier. I wish that high came with a warning label...because I just spent a good portion of the afternoon cussing like a sailor and having a very reasonable tantrum about where the hell I am supposed to start living now that my grandfather has passed away.
    My mom doesn't want to share the bungalow, and for good reason; it's nearly impossible to have a private phone conversation in that tiny house. I moved all my stuff out of my friend's parents' basement that I had stayed in up until my grandfather fell ill since their situation has recently changed. And on top of that my dad wants me to move all the rest of my childhood stuff out of his storage area by throwing it out or taking it with me. I could theoretically live in my half-brother's basement next door to my mom's place... On top of this, did I mention I have a Yaris? It's a GREAT car, but NOT for moving the amount of shit I am currently having to store in various places at my grandfather's house. That task alone would take several trips...if I even had a location in mind, which I don't. So I have no housing after having moved locations 4 times last year, no current job since I quit Oct. 2019 so I could have the energy to search for and buy a used car. As I said, a perfectly reasonable tantrum. It's not easy to carry all this around while grieving and pretending I'm fine. Which most of the time, I believe I am. My default state is typically not a sour one...