Ideal Relationship

Today I wrote down a list of what I would be looking for in a relationship and how my life would change if there was true chemistry and a few really interesting things came up. I know I would want someone who can tune into my needs, not that I wouldn't communicate them clearly but if someone wants to prove they are interested, they should only have to hear them once. For me this means if I mention that an untidy shared living space causes anxiety, I shouldn't have to be the one who always has to bring up the fact that we need to do some cleaning. It scares me to consider living with someone I feel inclined to nag about dishes, laundry or clutter. I'm not a neat freak; my bedroom is an absolute mess. But when I was living with my now ex, I found out that sharing a living space seems to make me feel a much greater need for a keeping things tidy. For one thing, if you want to invite people over, you will save yourself a great amount of effort if you have been consistent in doing the household chores. You will even feel much more willing to invite others over if you keep your place clean.

I would want someone who loves and accepts my quirks and who can be patient when I go through my ups and downs. My approach to dating has always been to be the most honest version of myself. I refuse to pretend to be what I think someone else might want me to be because that's how you set your own trap. It's impossible to find the right match when every time you go on a date, you act like a completely different person in an attempt to impress the man or woman sitting across from you. If they don't like that I talk too much or that I seem to be able to inhale food at the same rate as their dog when I'm starving, then that's fine. If they don't appreciate my jokes or my ability to recite obscure British comedy, that's fine too. I'm looking for someone who loves the whole package and I'm aware that some of my quirks can be off-putting, but I'm willing to occasionally embarrass myself in order to find the right guy. No, I'm not playing how to lose a guy in ten days, I'm just not going to waste time and energy on creating a false pretense about who I am. There's one person at work who said to me that I'm still single because I'm too independent. Hah! We're in the 21st century, I would hope that there are some good honest men out there who are interested in independent women by now. Sure, I want to be taken care of, but there should be give and take in a relationship and the giving and taking should be occurring on both sides if that is not already clear.

Anyway, another thing I wrote was that when I find the right someone, I will dream bigger and go through life with carefree abandon; I'd be able to go with the flow. I want someone who can make me believe in myself on a whole new level. That quote, "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" comes to mind. I want to brainstorm and co-create new adventures together. We're going to encourage each other to improve ourselves on a daily basis; I believe when you find the right person, the two of you will make each other feel inclined to grow, mature and blossom.