Stepping into Self-Love

I say I wish to be better
yet forget that I first
have to forgive myself
for not being so.

I say I want to love better,
yet forget to foster self-love
and to forgive myself
for withholding and denying
love.

I say I wish to listen better
yet forget that it's often
me that I ignore.

I do wish
to be better,
to love better,
to listen better.
But find that sometimes
I'm the person
who is hardest to forgive,
who is hardest to love,
who is hardest to hear.

Why is that?
Of all the people in the world,
I seem to like me the least.
How can that be?
I guess I just
have believed myself to be
more flawed than others.
More graceless and
imperfect than others.
More inconvenient
and annoying to be around...

So what can I do?
Find a way to forgive myself
for any and all transgressions
against myself and others.
Learn to love my imperfections,
even as I work to improve.
Learn to trust my voice;
both my silent intuition,
and my speech.

These aren't easy things to do.
But I remind myself,
that I don't wait for someone
to become "perfect",
flawless, or graceful
before I love them.

So why would I ever
withhold love from myself?
If I can acknowledge my shortcomings
without judgement
as I work on them,
I'll have taken a step
toward self-love.
If I can let go of my desire
to be understood by all,
I'll have taken a step
toward self-love.
If I can learn to trust my intuition
I'll have taken a step
toward self-love.